Ok... so, my neighbor Vinny, his girlfriend Amanda, and myself tied one on like no one's business last night. Well... I did... I'm not too sure about them = ).
So, Amanda's friend drove us to the ferry terminal. How nice! We will have a ride back, right? NO. Not right.
Let's back up for a second. Vinny and Amanda have a flight to make at 7am. Yes, that's right, 7am. They wanted to leave the bar around 1am. Reasonable. Sleep on the plane sorta thing. The driving friend knows this.
Around, oh, 2am, this girl decides she doesn't want to leave. Nice. How considerate. Personally, I don't care. I don't have to be up at any particular time today. I don't care. I DO however, think that is messed up and that you shouldn't do that to your friends. I wouldn't ever do that to someone.
Vinny, Amanda, Anthony, and I go to get a slice at the pi33aria on the corner (yes, it was leet... that was actually on the awning... the bar was on 33rd and 3rd). Anthony offered to drive us to the ferry. Very nice guy. If not for him, we would have missed the 230am ferry and would have had to sit there until 330am.
Yes, it's the tiny boat. The venerable "John A. Noble". I don't know who John A. Noble was, nor do I really care. He must have been some kind of horrible person b/c they named this shitty little tugboat ferry after him. I am generally pretty good at handling my liquor, but after a ride in a standard mustang and a rocking ferry boat, I am not so sure.
We get off the ferry and walk to the "taxi" ramp. They are not taxi's at all. The are guys who drive normal cars and call themselves "car service". Whatever.. just take my home. We get into the minivan cab and there is already a guy waiting there. We are the 2nd fare. Fantastic.
Mr. 2nd fare has no idea where he is going. He is on the phone with his stupid inner city friend who also does not know how to guide him to where he needs to go. I am ready to kill someone.
I am generally pretty good at handling my liquor, but after a ride in a standard mustang, a rocking ferry boat, and a jerky minivan in the rain, I am definitely not so sure... at all. I ask the driver to pull over. I need to give some back. Picture Jackie Chan in "The Legend of Drunken Master". I want to continue fighting, but, my levels aren't right. I feel better, but not by much.
Finally, Mr. 2nd fare figures out where he is going and gets dropped the hell off. The driver proceeds to our area. We guide him using the most direct route. It's like 345am. I want to die.
He misses this turn and pulls a U. He missed that turn and pulls a U. Is this some sort of cosmic joke? Are you for real guy? Lemme see your license! So he gets to our block. I say to him "3/4 of the way down, on the left". He proceeds to jerk stop at every house as if to say "this one? this one? this one? this one? this one?" thus straining even further my estomachal fortitude. He finally jerk stops close enough to my house.
I roll in like a tornado and go to sleep. I hope Vinny and Amanda had a decent flight.
And... to the girl that "didn't want to leave" b/c she was "having too much fun". Fuck you, bitch. I hope I never see you again. You are messed up and mostly what is wrong with people today. I wish you all the trouble and frustration that you caused us.
Posts
0 comments:
Post a Comment